The other day I was out taking a hike with my friend and we passed by a man with a young girl, perhaps his granddaughter, and my friend says” I’ve seen that guy on OurTime,” which is a dating website. That was the first time I had heard about OurTime.com so of course my ears perked up and I thought oh boy…more blogging material! I have posted the link here if you are looking for yet another dating site to try out. Here is what they say about their site: OurTime.com is the premier online 50+ dating service. OurTime.com is designed for 50+ dating, pen pals and to bring older singles together. http://www.ourtime.com/. That’s the Baby Boomer Generation and what this blog is all about. I also came across another one: AARP Dating. http://dating.aarp.org/. They say “We’ve changed the way online dating works – and it’s way better.”
That hiking experience reminded me of something that I had forgotten…that’s what is fun about this blog…lots of memories are coming around. Some good and some…well let’s just say some I learned from and that is what I want to share with you. So, what happens when you run into a former online date and what do you do? Here are a few of my experiences:
There was the guy that I had coffee with that was really into thin, athletic girls, according to his profile. I had written on my profile that I was “average” because well what exactly is average? I wasn’t too confident in my body image but I wasn’t exactly fat! In looking back, I shouldn’t have agreed to go on the date because it couldn’t end fast enough. We were definitely not a match. He was into every kind of sport imaginable and worked out every day. At that time I can honestly say I wasn’t exercising more than maybe an hour a week. I saw him months later when I decided to sign up for a gym membership. There he was lifting weights. He had the gloves and everything! I tried to avoid eye contact but really I didn’t have to worry because I certainly wasn’t sporting the sexy gym wear that some of the other girls were wearing so he never even noticed. I can laugh about it now but at the time I just wanted to run back into the locker room. I never met a guy at a gym that led to a date because I didn’t enjoy the gym. And besides do people actually date people they meet at a gym?
Speaking of that these days I go to the gym to do Yoga, Qi Gong or use the jacuzzi. I get my workout by partner dancing: West Coast Swing, Country Two Step, Jitterbug, Salsa and a few others. Guys this is something you should learn to do if you want to meet a woman/women. If you learn to partner dance you will never be shy of having a woman to dance with. A good male lead is worth his weight in GOLD!
Another guy I met online invited me to meet him at his work. He worked at a car dealership so I stopped by one day on my way home. I think I was just coming home from a trip to Berkeley where I had gotten horribly lost (this was long before I owned a smart phone.) I told him about how I got lost and he took me to his computer and brought up Google maps and showed me where I went the wrong way. I think he liked that his co-workers saw he could attract a pretty lady. After that meeting I just quietly slipped away because there wasn’t anything to bring me back for a second date. Later I saw him at Peet’s having coffee with another lady. He was very intent into the conversation and didn’t see me which was a good thing.
I haven’t really had too many awkward run in’s with people I met online thank goodness. But if I did, I am confident enough in myself these days (remember I started out online dating about 12 years ago) to think that I would be graceful and polite and hopefully if I stepped on any toes out there no one is mad at me. But then again I must admit there are the awkward times when you recognize him and he recognizes you but no one says anything – you just look away. That happened to me today. I smiled inwardly because that guy was such a jerk. At the time I went out with him I didn’t have as much confidence as I do now. These days (if I was still online dating) I wouldn’t tolerate such behavior. The man I am with now is very kind and respectful. It is proof to me that I have come such a long way.
Here’s a question for you. If you see someone who you recognize from a dating site, would you say hello or walk away? Have you had any awkward run-in’s from an online date? Feel free to comment on the blog. The comment button is at the top.
And before I forget…if you want some more first date ideas check out this blog: http://carolbalawyder.com/2013/09/12/top-ten-first-dates-the-market/